What I have received on e mail to help me

As we progress through the year 2011, I want to thank all of you for your educational e-mails over the past year. I am totally screwed up now and have little chance of recovery.

I no longer open a bathroom door without using a paper towel, or have the waitress put lemon slices in my ice water without worrying about the bacteria on the lemon peel.


I can't sit down on the hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed.

I have trouble shaking hands with someone who has been driving because the number one pastime while driving alone is picking one's nose.

Eating a little snack sends me on a guilt trip because I can only imagine how many gallons of trans fats I have consumed over the years.

I can't touch any woman's purse for fear she has placed it on the floor of a public restroom.

I MUST SEND MY SPECIAL THANKS to whoever sent me the one about rat poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet sponge with every envelope that needs sealing.

ALSO, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown) who is about to die for the 1,387,258th time.

I no longer have any money, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.

I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa's Novena has granted my every wish.

I can't have a drink in a bar because I'll wake up in a bathtub full of ice with my kidneys gone.

I can't eat at KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes, feet or feathers.

I can't use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

THANKS TO YOU I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

BECAUSE OF YOUR CONCERN, I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

I no longer buy petrol without taking someone along to watch the car so a serial killer doesn't crawl in my back seat when I'm filling up.


I no longer use Cling Wrap in the microwave because it causes seven different types of cancer.

AND THANKS FOR LETTING ME KNOW I can't boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face. Disfiguring me for life.

I no longer go to the movies because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS when I sit down.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

And I no longer answer the phone becausesomeone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica , Uganda , Singapore , and Uzbekistan ..

I no longer buy cookies from Timmies since I now have their recipe.

THANKS TO YOU I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big black snake could be lurking under the seat and cause me instant death when it bites my butt.

AND THANKS TO YOUR GREAT ADVICE I can't ever pick up $2.00 coin dropped in the parking lot because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting to grab me as I bend over.


I can't do any gardening because I'm afraid I'll get bitten by the Violin Spider and my hand will fall off.

If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 p.m. tomorrow afternoon, and the fleas from 120 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's best friend's beautician . .

Oh, by the way.....

A German scientist from Argentina , after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain activity read their e-mail with their hand on the mouse.

Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.

P. S.: I now keep my toothbrush in the living room, because I was told by e-mail that water splashes over 6 ft. out of the toilet.
NOW YOU ALL HAVE YOURSELVES A VERY GOOD DAY!

Boy by looking at this store, I thought I was back in the states.

What a beatiful morning for JUNKANOO

Boxing Day Junkanoo Parade

Joshua Kevin and myself at The Dig Friday night

New Straw Market is OPEN at last

The FIX.

There recently was an article in the St. Petersburg , Fl. Times. The Business Section Asked readers for ideas on: "How Would You Fix the Economy?" I think this guy nailed it !


Dear
Mr. President,

Please find
Below my suggestion for fixing America 's economy.
Instead of giving billions of dollars to companies
That will squander the money on lavish parties and
Unearned bonuses, use the following plan.


You can call it the
"Patriotic Retirement
Plan":



There are about 40
Million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them
$1 million apiece, severance for early retirement !
With the following
Stipulations:

1) They MUST
Retire ! Forty million job openings -
Unemployment
Fixed !



2) They Must buy a new
American made Car. Forty million cars ordered -
Auto Industry fixed !


3) They MUST :
Either buy a house, or pay off their mortgage -
Housing Crisis fixed !



It can't
Get any easier than
That !!



P.S. If more money is
needed, have all members in Congress pay their
Taxes !!



Mr. President, while
You're at it, make Congress retire on Social
Security and Medicare. I'll bet both programs would
Be fixed, pronto !



If you think
this would work, please forward to everyone you
Know !

This is funny, enjoy

Hey it is Christmas Morning,

Folks it is so hard to look at the calendar and see it is Christmas all ready. It seems like we just did this not to long ago. I watch Christmas Story last night. It is on TBS. It will be running for 24 hours, if you would like to watch it? http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085334/
Yes this setting was back in my days. I remember so many things that I can relate to. The snow, older cars. How people used things to make their Christmas tree. Oh plus how he had trouble with the furnace. I remember some smoke coming up in our apartment a couple of times. Plus the smells of food being cooked down stairs. They were a Italian family. It was wonderful to smell their food cooking. Walking to school in the snow. I don't remember having any bullies, until I got older. The BB gun I remember very much how I would love one too. Now how about the tongue stuck to the flag pole??? Oh I think we all did that one time or other. Now my dad didn't win a lamp (leg) Boy Ralph really understood. (Laugh now)
Boy we all have memories and days like today we all go back and remember these things. Sometimes we don't want to remember certain things.
I pray that today you remember all the good you and your family had back then. My prayers are that if you had a bad life before, that you can start a New One with Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savor.

I have beem trying to send my news letter out, but some e mail addresses are not going through

Merry Christmas and Happy New Years

MI just would like to give everyone update on all that has happen this last year. It has been a road with some bumps and even had some potholes too. Looking back I was still blessed in so many ways. If you have not be keeping up on my blog (http://tombahamasblogspot.com) This is my main way of telling the world all that has happen in my life since I have been here in the Bahamas. Yes I have been here now 6 and half years. I only sign up for 6 months.
I came here with pretty much things in a bag and now I have so much more. Our Lord has given me a change to raise a son here. His name is Kevin Emmanuel Poitier, he is 16 years old. He has been part of my life since I came back in 2005. His sisters and his mom lived next store to me, when I lived across the street of the ALC. So we have had some moments of growing together during those years. He has been living at the Camp with me now since June 2011. Last week I was showing him some picture I took back then. Boy he sure has grown up.
At the ALC some things have changed too. Mark Wallace is now our boss. Pastor Chet and his family are still part of the family, but they went back to Fort Lauderdale, Florida, at the first part of the year.
We really have not done that much with the new bath house. But as I speak I hear them in the back ground doing some work. That is very good news to hear.
Over all I look back and see our Lord Jesus Christ very much part of all we do here and look forward in seeing this next year (2012).
Oh yes, I have a dog too now. His name is Scooby he was Pastor Chet’s. So you can just image all that has happen. Please if you think of us this Christmas. Please say a prayer or two. We have been blessed by Him and a couple of other people that have taken their time to help in our funds. If you could understand what the cost is to live here? I have now three mouths to feed. Please if you would like to bless us. Contact
Shepherds Staff web site: http://www.shepsstaff.org/schafer.aspx. (4303 my account)
Merry Christmas and have a great News Years too. I LOVE YOU ALL.
If you want to contact us at toms@alcbahamas.org
If you like to see our web page: www.alcbahamas.org
Love Tom and Kevin

Just wantd to say THANK YOU ALL

Yes this last Saturday was my birthday. BIG 60?????Got up and tried to get to my e mails. It just worked for about half hour. I tried going on Face Book and even today will not let me in. So this is me sending a THANK-YOU TO ALL OF YOU THAT SENT ME A CARD OR FACE BOOK. I am very sorry about not writing sooner. I was hoping to get in and write to each one of you. Just a note why I am still writing on the computer today. I have this week off. by Mark's orders.
Folks if you know me at all, I really try not to spend to much time on the computer. Each morning I try to write something on my blog then write back to the ones that send me e mails. Plus like I said before, I have some trouble with inter net or computer. Not sure which one it is. I had a guy out here a couple of weeks ago, he was telling me that my memory card doesn't let me get in and out that easy. He said I need more memory. Like two cards, both 2 G each. I really not sure why that would be?
Okay now let me tell you what had happen on my birthday.
1) We had Kevin's family come over and have some good food and talking and even playing some games. What really was neat, they all showed up. Kevin's sisters and his dad. His mom came and left and then came back and that is how I got the shot below. Kevin has been telling me a couple of things about his passed. First is he doesn't have any pictures of his family. So I took a lot of them during their time here.
2) It is very hard to ever get them all together. So we pushed forward and asked and asked again. Pretty much every one came.
3) I have been wondering about his family since I am very much part of it now. How can we do Christmas this year? You know what I live on, so gifts are out for any one. So Kevin and I went shopping and bought all we needed to make this happen.
That is part one of my day.
Next Kevin and I were invited to our Singles ministry. So we both got some what dressed up. I went to put on the suit that I worn 4 years ago. The water here really causes your waste band to stink?????? Not sure how that happens. So Kevin now has both of my suits. He really did look shape that night. I am very proud of him and how he is growing up.
So we all went to the place called Verge Barbecue. A really nice place. The prices are high but you can feed two to three people from one plate. I thought the ribs needed to be cooked more. They were red inside. I found out they were smoked not grilled. This night was to cost around $40.00 pre person. But there is a friend of ours that works for Atlantis.(Shelly) (Thank you) She bought our appetizer. So the bill was cut in half. It only cost me $40.00 for the both of us, Kevin and myself.
After dinner Veda had them send out the crew for birthdays. They sang a song and gave me a cup cake. Plus someone wrote on the plate Happy Birthday. It really was nice and I was surprised.
From there we took a walk around and ended up at the Star Bucks in Atlantis. We all sat down and Veda played some games with us. Kevin did well, he answer most of the questions before Veda asked. But he only got one prize. The rest he gave away to others that didn't have any.
Now was the time for the group shot. We did on the stair case. It really did come out nice. All the pictures I am talking about are below.
Then we went and did some dancing. That was Kevin,Veda,Michelle,Syla and Urraca. Boy they had some fun. They all did the Slide. Kevin and I left around midnight. Boy it sure was a long day

Now look very carefully. Funny they closed 20 mintues before

The Candy Cane

The Candy Cane Story (legend)

The Candy Cane Story

A candy maker in Indiana wanted to make a candy that would remind people of the true meaning of Christmas; so he made the candy cane to incorporate several symbols for the birth, ministry, and death of Jesus Christ. He began with a stick of pure white, hard candy. White to symbolize the Virgin Birth and the sinless nature of Jesus, and hard to symbolize the Solid Rock, the foundation of the Church, and the firmness of the promises of God.

The candy maker then shaped his cane into the form of a "J" to represent the precious name of Jesus, who came to the earth as Savior. It could also represent the staff of the "Good Shepherd" with which He reaches down to to reclaim the fallen lambs who, like sheep, have gone astray.

Thinking that the candy was somewhat plain, the candy maker stained it with red stripes. He used three small stripes to show the stripes of the scourging Jesus received. The large red stripe was for the blood shed by Christ on the cross so that we could have the promise of eternal life.

This one of the Haition Settlement here on New Providence Bahamas

This is Kevins family and friends

Last night we had our Christmas party for single's plus it was my birthday too. BIG 60

What is going on with the old bath house

Well last week-end we had some college kids here. During their stay I kept hearing the water pump running on and off. Pastor Ed looked at it and fixed that part. Now the mens urinals kept on running. So we dicided to repair them. Found out that there is a lot more to repair than we first thought. So then thought replace only the urinals water supply. Started doing that and found out there is pipe tied in to other pipes. We went back to the source. So we first put a new valve on the main line. So during the repairs, the guys working on the new bath house will have water, to mix up what they need. Worked great, then while cutting the old lines found out the water was coming in with the old pipe in the wall. So we capped all line that we thought were tried together. Then I went to open the main valve and no water at all. What is going on. So Pastor Ed and I thought we can do this. So I capped more lines and still didn't work. Pastor Ed left to go back home yesterday. So during my time trying to figure this out. I called Mark. So we cut the new valve out. That was okay. Cut the old valve out and found that was closed. HOW. I tried closing that the first time working on the water lines. It didn't close. That is why we put the new valve in. Now I just cut out ALL the old pipes. Ran a new line to the bath house. Now have water. So I thought great. Turned on the water. I heard water running inside the building. What could that be? I found out it was one of the new pipes we put in for the urinal. What happen was while I was bolting down the new pipe I pulled the strap to tight. Broke off at the top. Now this is why we put in new pipe so we would not have to take the old urinals down. Now I have to pull the one down to repair it. Boy Lord I really am not having any fun with this. I thought in maybe two days have all new pipes in and having good flow for the bath house. Today I have to pull the urinal and then finish up the girl's side. It just seem like we can not win. The only reason we are doing all this is. The new bath House will not be ready for CCA (160) kids coming in January 2012. So this is our only bath room for them.

Have been working on the old bath house.

Had to say good bye to some of our friends today.

Last night was our Christmas get togther for ALC

Afriend sent these and I thought you all would enjoy them